Hello people.
You must have been wondering where have I gone to.
Not to worry.
I'm still here.
Alive.
A lot of things have been happening.
Kinda overwhelming for me.
Funny, how things can change.
Too fast.
I've changed.
And when I'm changed, everybody around me is affected.
You can call me selfish.
Or confused.
And maybe now, you can call me a bitch.
Well, the thing is, exactly today, last year, bf celebrated an early birthday with me.
He had asked his ma to cook lunch for me at his house.
He bought me a lovely little teddy bear whom I'd named Tutti.
But today, I sit here alone at home.
Wondering who to text.
Wondering who to hang out with.
Afterall, I've devoted my entire life to bf.
Abandoned some of my girlfriends for bf too.
Abandoned CCA to spend time with bf too.
But all is but a waste.
Earlier this year, I broke up with bf.
Through e-mail.
Yes, e-mail.
After almost 3 years of relationship with him.
Yah yah. Yes, you can call me selfish bitch. blaa blaa blaa.
But he was at Paris!
I cant give him a long distance call.
I can't take a flight to Paris just so I can tell him that I wanted to break up with him.
You must be wondering, why?
Why I broke up with him?
Owh well, sometimes, some things are just not meant to be explained.
For example, you can't explain why students in the classroom keep looking at the clock as though if they continue staring at the clock, the time will go faster.
You can't explain why people punch the lift button repeatedly as though it will make the lift arrive any faster.
It's like that. I just don't know how to explain.
Some things can't be explained.
Come to think of it, sometimes, I do hate myself for doing things that I've sworn earlier in life that I'll never do.
Hey, I stumbled onto your blog by chance and forgive me for intruding your privacy by reading your post.
ReplyDeleteThis post in particular is something that I can relate to considering the identical complexity in both of our situations.
You know our love and dedication to the special someone make us forget who we are and regrettably, our friends too as we often confide in our loved ones, thinking each time they'll always be there for us and that we are confident that they will be part of our future plans.
I believe in something that love is not blind and that the lovers are blind, cos' we are blinded by the intense flash of love that we can't see other bright sparks in the sky.
When the unfortunate break up happened, we are left stranded, not knowing where to go or what to do.
My advice for you is to convince yourself that you have made a wrong decision by indulging gargantuan faith and love to your ex and patch things up with your friends. Yes, it'll be awkward and so is life and everything that's embedded in it .
- Fayyadz.